Inspired by Halloween, I started thinking about how so often we "dress up" or conceal our true selves in our relationship and our lives. It's all too easy to "put on a mask", so to speak, instead of being authentic and vulnerable with our partner and ourselves. Typically, we learn to wear these masks early in life and they're essential to helping us survive different situations, such as unhealthy family dynamics, school, etc. Eventually, we can lose awareness of the mask that we're wearing and put it on without being consciously aware of what we're hiding. I will be talking about just a few of the common masks that I see people wear (myself included at times). There are many more than just these few examples, which means you may wear a mask that looks very different from these. Consider which masks you've been wearing: 

The Peacekeeper 
If you've been wearing the mask of the peacekeeper, you m ...

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A number of years ago, I witnessed a ballet piece entitled "After the Rain." I've seen this piece at least 5 times onstage since and every time I cry. In 9 minutes, the two dancers convey the richness of a relationship in a way that words can't express. Something about it just gets me. If you want to watch the piece, here's a link: 

The title, "After the Rain", could mean many things to many people. To me, it's referring to the period of time after a hardship is over. The cancer is in remission - now what? Your partner got sober - now what? You left that abusive relationship - now what? Your partner returned from a deployment - now what? You're going back to work after being unemployed - now what? So often, we assume that once the rain has passed, ...

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For years, you've likely heard about people being classified into one of two categories based off of their energy level and way of moving through the world. In case you have no idea what I mean when I say "Type A" or "Type B", type As are go-getters. They don't like to procrastinate, they move quickly and efficiently, and they often are schedule-oriented, preferring to have a plan for their day. They feel best when they are accomplishing tasks and achieving goals. Type Bs are more laid-back. They don't mind waiting to get things done, they prefer to take their time when working on something, and they typically prefer spontaneity instead of a set schedule or plan. What feels freeing and good to a person who is type A is going to feel confining and overwhelming to a type B. So how does this work in a relationship where you may have two type As, two type Bs, or one of each? And how can you solve problems that each pairing typically runs into? Read o ...

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