The Longevity Myth.

I was in my previous relationship for 8 years and considering that we started dating when I was 19, this was quite an accomplishment for someone of my age. He and I could walk into any party and I said, "8 years" with such pride when people would ask how long we had been together. I knew with certainty that we were the longest lasting couple in the room every time. I also say it with pride that my parents have been married for over 30 years. That my aunt and uncle have also been married for over 30 years and my grandparents have been married for more than 50. It's like some strange badge of honor I wear - that I myself was in such a long-term relationship and that I am surrounded by others in my family who are as well. My therapist recently asked me a good question though: why? 

I'm still working to figure out that answer, but I know I'm not alone. I love watching those youtube videos about the couple that has been together f ...

Read more

Into the Great Unknown.

Last week I met up with a friend who I had not seen in over ten years. We filled each other in on our lives since that time which included talking about our current relationships. She told me in no uncertain terms that her husband is not the same man she married. While this is a common thing for people to say about their spouses (something along the lines of "I don't know who they are anymore"), in her case, she really meant it. After getting married, her husband completely changed his religious beliefs in a far more conservative direction and it's impacted every aspect of their marriage and life together. It was a big and sudden change. She's faced with a huge question: now what? 

The truth is that when you agree to marry someone, you're agreeing to marry someone you don't know. You don't know who that person is going to be in a year, 5 years, 30 years - and you're taking that plunge anyways. There was no way my friend could ...

Read more

See the Forest, not the Trees.

On July 14, 2018, I became engaged. My fiancé hung pictures of us from the ceiling of a beautiful gazebo that he lit with candles. He got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife. I said yes without a second thought. When the second thought came it was, “Whoa, we’re going to have to plan a wedding!” While I had day-dreamed on and off for years about what I would like my wedding to look like, it hit me that now was the time to actually plan it. To look at venues, find catering, pick out a dress, and flowers and eventually walk down the aisle and say, “I do.”

You may have heard of the expression “see the forest, not the trees.” What it means is that it’s more important to see the big picture than the small details. I am already realizing that this is crucial when planning a wedding and also one of the most challenging pieces of it. As facebook and pinterest inundate me daily with links to click on for how I can choose a wedding ...

Read more

Loading...

Loading...

Loading...

Loading...

Loading...